like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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