We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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