How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
