i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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