So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I checked into jail on foursquare
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
