Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
