rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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