We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
