I hate your face
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
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