i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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