question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
