and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
