don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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