So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize