I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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