His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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