yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
They have beer where we have blood.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
