I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I am naked and annoyed.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize