i think i have two assholes
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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