it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
we should paint friendship bongs
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