He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
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