we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?