Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
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this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
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We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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