Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
