if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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