How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
