He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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