this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
