i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize