I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
