K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Randomize
