I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
