i don't like sucking hair
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
