Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
