it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize