Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
