why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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