So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
