I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
