just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
These tits shall not be calmed
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
