I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
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