you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
