I hate all girls vehemently.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
