You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
whose ass print is on the piano?
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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