i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Randomize