i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
The air taste purple.
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