Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
