Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Randomize