I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
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I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
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She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
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