My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
