drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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